Goodbye


The trees have burned and lost their glow–
No longer flames of orange and yellow
Dance as tongues on outstretched limbs,
Now heaps of cold coals, the fire dims;
Charred skeletons meet ashen sky,
Grey clouds emotionlessly cry
Cold tears fall softly, numb the ground.
Sharp wind blows glitter past shrubs royally crowned.
Cloth devours skin as moths grow thin,
Winter’s darkness enters in;
It lingers unwelcomed for a spell
Then Spring returns and all is well,
But now we dwell in interim
Where air is cold and outcome grim:
Three months sit and shivering wait
For cruel cold claw to dissipate.
Yet while Jack Frost displays his powers
There remain moments, minutes, hours
Of realized warmth and God-given bliss:
Hot cocoa after sledding, Christmas–
And though the unsettling chill drags on
Eventually will come the dawn
Of warmer days and it is clear
That life yet once again is here:
The burnt arrayed in vibrant laurels
That forgive the arsonist his quarrels.
Our words, then, have played the traitor:
We said goodbye, but meant see you later

For http://creativewriting.ie/2011/09/05/writing-prompt-september-5th/

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10 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. C.B. Wentworth
    May 19, 2011 @ 02:25:34

    A year of seasons meets artistic word smithing at its finest. :-) Truly, a lovely read.

    Reply

  2. Mike Patrick
    Jul 27, 2011 @ 17:59:17

    You show flashes of brilliance. I started at the beginning, but here is where you begin finding your voice. I enjoy the couplet rhyme, but hope to find something more complicated farther up.

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Jul 27, 2011 @ 20:00:45

      Thank you! I’ve experimented with a small number of styles (and looking to try out quite a few more) I do favor rhymed over unrhymed. I’d love to know what you consider to be complicated–is there a particular style I should try out? :)

      Reply

  3. Mike Patrick
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 15:50:23

    Have you ever considered a sonnet. Amazingly difficult starting off, but easier with time. For a Shakespearian sonnet, the rhyme scheme is: a-b-a-b, c-d-c-d, e-f-e-f for three quatrains and then finished with a g-g couplet. Ideally, it is written in iambic pentameter, but that is really tough starting out. Simply using the alternating rhyme scheme of a-b-a-b is difficult enough for practice. My sonnets are no exemplars of what sonnets should be, but this is one I rather liked.
    http://thepoetsquill.wordpress.com/2011/06/23/sonnet-for-a-hotel-sidewalk/ Most of mine are of a much more romantic nature.

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 16:40:42

      I think I have written a Shakespearean sonnet before, perhaps once. Though maybe that’s just a figment of my imagination. I wrote a Robert Browning styled sonnet–it had a different rhyme scheme. I will be sure to let you know when I post a true Shakespearean-styled sonnet. I really enjoyed your sonnet, especially the contrast between the blood spilled on the sidewalk and the red carpet. I’ll have to read more of your poetry, especially since you’ve dutifully slogged through mine :)

      Reply

  4. ShonEjai
    Sep 10, 2011 @ 17:09:40

    Thank you for dropping by and submitting an entry the challenge….and what a wonderfully beautiful entry this is. You words are spellbinding! Well done! I hope you continue with the challenge.

    Reply

  5. viewingcamelot
    Aug 31, 2013 @ 11:17:15

    Wow, this was breathtaking.

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Sep 01, 2013 @ 22:26:33

      Thank you! Wow–you’ve read so much of my blog! I’m slowly trying to catch up to having a picture + poem on each post. But I’m still adding them to February of this year, so it’ll take me a while… :)

      Reply

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