Covenantal Crows


Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time that I am here?
These oversized crows with their oversized voices
Prophesying many dark pre-chosen choices
Foreboding feelings flood my senses
Paranoia paralyzes me

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37 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. johnlmalone
    Oct 06, 2011 @ 03:48:01

    very clever and enjoyable; only one thing : why did you not rhyme the last two lines when the rest of the poem rhymes? I’m not being critical, just curious.

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Oct 06, 2011 @ 11:15:51

      Thanks–I was trying to go for a stark ending (the paranoia stops the rhyme), but I probably should have had one more rhyming couplet before an orphaned line to set it off.

      Reply

  2. charlesmashburn
    Oct 06, 2011 @ 07:34:57

    I understand what you’re saying! I think we’ve been listening to the same news broadcast.
    http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/10/05/treasure/

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Oct 06, 2011 @ 11:42:38

      Haha I turned off the news long ago–probably should be more attuned to it, but… Loved your poem like a child likes finding a discarded penny (actually I still collect discarded pennies) :)

      Reply

  3. johnlmalone
    Oct 06, 2011 @ 07:53:11

    I love the last stanza of ‘Treasure’: absolutely wonderful. it redeems the whole poem

    Reply

  4. Poetry & Icecream
    Oct 06, 2011 @ 08:43:43

    Very clever. I enjoyed reading this :)

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Oct 06, 2011 @ 11:48:45

      Thanks! Crows are clever birds. I took a video of a crow battling a McDonalds meal. Someone had left a crumpled bag in the parking garage and the crow thrwe it around until a little box fell out of it. Then it jumped on the box and pecked it until it finally opened. There was half a fry inside.

      Reply

  5. Rajlakshmi
    Oct 06, 2011 @ 11:27:55

    a very unique write,,, beautifully worded

    Reply

  6. The Orange Tree
    Oct 06, 2011 @ 12:52:12

    this is fun.

    Reply

  7. mairmusic
    Oct 06, 2011 @ 21:31:15

    The Carpenters never saw it coming… (:

    Reply

  8. disjointedrhymings
    Oct 07, 2011 @ 05:17:57

    Great write :)

    Reply

  9. Jack Edwards
    Oct 07, 2011 @ 08:54:52

    Cleverly written. Great stuff!

    Here is my entry:
    http://jackedwardspoetry.blogspot.com/2011/10/everyone.html

    Reply

  10. C Rose
    Oct 07, 2011 @ 09:17:53

    Haunting bit of work, enjoyed the lead in, a line sung so sweetly given such a great twist. ~ Rose

    Reply

  11. Sarah Johnston
    Oct 07, 2011 @ 12:37:00

    very clever write and well done like the way you presented this
    http://gatelesspassage.com/2011/10/05/today%e2%80%99s-feelings/

    Reply

  12. poetryroad
    Oct 07, 2011 @ 16:53:34

    That poem is just fun fun fun! Now I will have that song stuck in my head! Great job!

    Reply

  13. emanita01
    Oct 08, 2011 @ 04:09:36

    Nice. I enjoyed this one :-)

    Reply

  14. halfwaybetweenthegutter
    Oct 10, 2011 @ 22:33:56

    Ah, I like poems with a mixture of rhymes and sudden endings. I really enjoyed this, I’ll be looking back in :)

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Oct 10, 2011 @ 22:44:28

      Thanks! I like to use a variety of styles so that the reader doesn’t know quite what to expect–that way I have the element of surprise :) I hope you will check back around, there’s a good variety so perhaps you’ll find some gems among the garbage ;)

      Reply

  15. Trackback: The Breath of Spring « Poetry and Icecream
  16. clariice
    Oct 12, 2011 @ 17:22:06

    Non-friendly birds.Interesting way to play with words. Good descriptive scene!

    Reply

  17. anjum wasim dar
    Oct 12, 2011 @ 17:29:15

    nature has its own ways and plans which must be accepted and understood, sometimes its difficult to accept crows.great poem

    Reply

  18. voiceoftruelove
    Oct 13, 2011 @ 21:39:32

    strong imagery, in my view

    Reply

  19. duncancleary
    Oct 14, 2011 @ 18:57:10

    Corvidae are much maligned, but reward attention.

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Oct 15, 2011 @ 02:16:59

      I love ravens and jays and even magpies, but I don’t like crows. They demand attention constantly and thus become a caricature. Perhaps it’s their all-too-human attributes that frighten me :)

      Reply

  20. Trackback: April 28 National Blog Tour: Bird Poems « wordcoaster

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