Do the Dew Look Red to You?


On the other side of the fence I lurk
A million jade knives left lying on the ground
The morning blood drips down
I am the grass let me work

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16 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. M.A.S
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 01:55:37

    The whole thing is great. The images are striking, but the last line works so well!

    Reply

  2. lalelu
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 03:43:04

    The last line is indeed kind of hopeful. But on the other side: grass will be cropped again and again. So it means that after a short time of recreation and growth it will always be the same pain. So at the end there’s no hope at all. That’s sad…

    Reply

  3. Susannah
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 04:46:59

    “A million jade knives left lying on the ground” – what a great line/description! Wonderful. 🙂

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 10:41:37

      Thank you! That was the line I built the poem around–I think it’s interesting that we call pieces of grass ‘blades’ yet frolic around barefoot in them 🙂

      Reply

  4. kaykuala
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 04:51:15

    Mixed feeling on this.. What a lucky break!

    Reply

  5. Old Ollie
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 08:10:14

    A million jade knives ….lines like this is why I love poetry!

    Reply

  6. lolamouse
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 09:46:41

    I thought this reminded me of Sandburg! Very cool poem, and I love the last line. I wish the neighbor would just let the grass work instead of cutting it at 7:00 on Sunday morning!

    Reply

    • wordcoaster
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 10:49:40

      Thanks! Ha, recently one of my friends posted on facebook asking when was an appropriate hour to start mowing the lawn. No one replied 7:00–I think 8:30 was the earliest. It’s been too hot here for the grass to grow so instead I wake up with the sheets all stuck to me, drenched in sweat. : /

      Reply

  7. Mike Patrick
    Jul 29, 2011 @ 15:17:40

    This was great. Splendid metaphors.

    Reply

  8. Ella
    Aug 02, 2011 @ 18:34:49

    I love the line a million jade knives! Wow~

    Reply

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Because Russ L asked

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